If I Were A SantaTuesdayWith MeMe

Merry Christmas to all my blogging friends. However, the following is especially for the females.(author unknown)
If I were a Santa, you know what I would do, I'd dump silly gifts that are given to you. I would bring you things you have lost, but treasured before.

I'd give you back all your maidenly vigor.  Than restore the old color that once graced your hair, before times and bleaches took residence there.

I would remove all your wrinkles and leave only one chin, so you could not spend hours rubbing grease on your skin. You'd never have hot flashes or queer dizzy spells. And, you would not hear noises like ringing of bells.

I would bring back the shape you were gifted. So things now suspended need not be uplifted.  I'd draw in your tummy and smooth down your back, till you would be a dream in those tight fitting slacks.

No sore, aching feet and no corns on your toes.  No searching for your glasses when they are right on your nose.

You would never have a headache, so no pills would you take.  No heating pad needed since your muscles won't ache.  Yes, if I were Santa, you would never look stupid.  You would be a cute little chick with the romance of a cupid.

But alas, I am not Santa.  I am simply just me. Even though we have grown older this wish is a sincere